100 Things I Don’t Particularly Like

By: April Edwards

1. Cheese burns.
2. Old people’s hands.
3. Dry hands.
4. Computer classes.
5. Mutton chops.
6. Dogs.
7. The way paper feels on my hands.
8. The way chalk dust feels on my hands.
9. Beets or borscht.
10.Skinheads or the KKK.
11.Wearing a bra that doesn’t fit.
12.Socks with holes in them.
13.White people that don’t know they’re white.
14.Potpourri.
15.Drunken frat boys.
16.The promotional cards in magazines that always fall out.
17.The Hills.
18.Extreme PDA.
19.Beady eyes.
20.The names “LaTasha”, “ShaTasha” or “DaTasha” (What's wrong with "Natasha"?)

21.Snakes.
22.Wheat bread that’s really white bread in disguise.
23.Stale coffee.
24.History.
25.Food left in the sink.
26.Getting a recorded tape of Irish ballads for Christmas.
27.Overly enthusiastic lotion salesmen.
28.Screaming children.
29.Razor burn.
30.Having to share a lap lane with an overly enthusiastic swimmer.
31.Excel.
32.Progressive car insurance commercials.
33.Sugar alcohols. They fool me every time.
34.Snapping turtles.
35.Reading.
36.Fake laughter.
37.Fake cheese.
38.Too much rosemary in food.
39.Grated carrots.
40.Tsunamis.
41.Avocados.
42.Justin Bieber.
43.The way a spray tan smells.
44.Aluminum foil.
45.Dungeons and Dragons.
46.Sappy movies.
47.Gorilla Glue getting on my hands.
48.Waterproof mascara.
49.Crotch-less panties.
50.Cliques.
51.Library security guards.
52.Cheap headphones.
53.Tattoos of cartoon characters.
54.Warm soda.
55.Warm milk.
56.Cheesy license plates.
57.Extremely long acronyms.
58.Leopard print tights.
59.See-through sunglasses.
60.Permanent makeup.
61.Microsoft.
62.Overly romantic behaviors.
63.Getting pancake syrup on my hands.
64.Screaming babies.
65.Cleaning eggs off of a skillet.
66.Drama queens.
67.Getting sand in mouth.
68.Analog clocks.
69.Yellow cars.
70.Getting $0.99 in change.
71.Swimming in murky water.
72.Knuckle hair on women.
73.Cheap water bottles.
74.Cheap pens.
75.Grass stains.
76.Unibrows.
77.Salisbury steak.
78.People who eat baby octopi in Japanese restaurants.
79.The texture of oatmeal.
80.The color Olive.
81.Saying “in the floor” instead of “on the floor”.
82.Hummers.
83.Grown women who act like they’re still in high school.
84.Tape residue.
85.Mice that come out of nowhere.
86.Robot Chicken.
87.Skype. It never runs smoothly.
88.Dirty carpets.
89.Changing the vacuum bag.
90.People who play with their tongue rings.
91.Subtitles.
92.Folding shirts.
93.Knee socks that won’t stay up.
94.Skim milk.
95.Emotional hangovers.
96.Dull knives.
97.Getting popcorn stuck in my teeth.
98.Obvious plastic surgery.
99.Body odor.
100.Miley Cyrus and her alter ego.